Some people really want million dollar weddings. They want the dresses, the super chic venue, the crystal tree centerpieces, the $5000 catering budget - and I think that's all fine and dandy. Me, on the other hand, I wanted to wear jeans and a t-shirt on a hot July day.
We got married on a whim. We had only known one another for about 2 months before we decided to become Mr. and Mrs. It was one of those cliches of "When you know, you just know". I didn't get married to rebel against my parents; I didn't get married for money; I wasn't pregnant. I just knew.
How did we meet?
Ev and I met in a bar. We are every romantic cliche ever lived.
He was by himself and I was with a friend, her brother, and another one of her friends. It was around 4 AM and we were all on the East Side (for non St. Louis natives - East Saint Louis, IL) at a bar called Pops. We'd just left Oz and we weren't ready to go home (I was in full-out party mode last spring-summer). When we got to Pops, I didn't have enough cash to get in the club so I had to find an ATM inside the bar. Of course, I ended up not paying nor did I go find an ATM. Instead, I wandered onto the dance floor and started dancing to some country rave music (Pops is kind of strange, y'all). There were a few guys who asked to buy me a drink but, I gave them my lecture about boy drugging girls and they quickly gave up.
Then Ev walked up. He asked to buy me a drink. I said no and gave him the same lecture as the guys before but, this time, I gave him permission to go get me a water (as if boys can't drug water). I don't know what it was about him that made me trust him to go get me water. Maybe it was because his skin was super chocolately and dark; or maybe it was his super bright, white, straight smile; or maybe it was his thick, African accent. Whatever it was, it was strong enough to have me confused about how people got drugged.
We danced a little and then the guy that I'd come with that night dragged me away from Ev. He kept me with him for a little while but, the tequila in me told me to wander off. I wandered back to the dance floor and Ev found me again. He asked me for my number and I gave him that "boy, bye" look. He must've liked it because he smiled real big, flashing that pretty smile again. I gave in and gave him my number.
We went on a date two days later.
Two months later, we decided to get married.
We actually missed our first ceremony. We'd gone through all the pre-motions of getting married and then we both got cold feet.
I didn't start getting dressed for the ceremony until an hour before it began, knowing it was going to take longer. He didn't get to my house until 20 minutes before the ceremony began and the location was 40 minutes away. Then, he stopped at a liquor store to get his signature drink - rum. Not only did we show up about 40 minutes late, we showed up with an aggravated bride and a rum-happy groom.
After missing our first ceremony, we though seriously about whether or not we were doing the right thing getting married. Ultimately, we realized that marriage wasn't actually the end of the world and that we would be okay. We still wanted to be married.
So, we scheduled a ceremony with Love Nest in St. Charles, Missouri. We got dressed together, made no liquor store stops. The only stop we made was grabbing my friends who had no idea that they'd be going to my wedding.
With everyone in shock in the small chapel, we got married. Knees shaking, nervous sweating... we finally did it. We were now a unit.
How did I know he was it?
This is something people ask us all the time. To be honest, I didn't know if he was it... I didn't know if Ev was the person that I was supposed to end up marrying. I just knew that I liked him. I can honestly say that I was not in love with him at the time we got married. I thought he was a nice guy and I thought he was fine and interesting. Our marriage was a complete experiment. We wanted to see just how we could make it work. People kept telling us that our last-minute, spontaneous marriage would fail.
I honestly am the happiest and most content I have ever been. Every time I may seem unsure, he know how to bring me back again. He knows the words to say... he knows how to look at me... he knows exactly how to love me. Honestly, this has been the greatest adventure. Eloping was the best decision for me.