The Burden of HATE
Happy Monday, y'all. I know a lot of people hate Mondays but, I absolutely love them. For me, Mondays have always been a chance to start fresh. I am most inspired by Monday mornings. Mondays set the tone for the rest of the week for me so, I always try to start on the most positive note possible.
This morning, though, on my lovely Monday, May 21, 2018, someone tried to steal my peace, sis, and I just wasn't having it.
So, like most millennial drama, it all started early this morning, before 8:00 AM, when I posted to my private Facebook page the following status.
Now, this status was not meant to hurt anyone's feelings but rather get people thinking about how much progress humanity could make if we would just learn to love one another. Unfortunately, my post about being happy for people turned some people into bitter, sour apples. Someone even shared the post (I'm a regular girl, not a superstar) calling me dumb and the "female Kanye West". He then went on to tell me how other races and cultural groups love their culture the most and that, basically, I was being counterproductive by asking black people to be "nice".
Honestly, I don't know where to start but, I think I'll just dive right in and state my piece.
Those who know me on a personal level know that I am very passionate about my message as a human being, an activist, a black woman, and as an artist. I have always, since I was a little girl, challenged the easy route. I've often played the annoying role of "Devil's Advocate" when it came to matters of morality and the church (S/O to my Auntie Linda, especially, for teaching me to question everything. I love and miss you, Big Lin). Couple my naturally political nature with a constant need of education (S/O to my mama for making me knowledge-hungry) and a overwhelming need to read all the books I could get my hands on (S/O Auntie Phyllis for being a huge part of my love of books), and you have a ME. Add me + Facebook and you get a lot of drama. I know people are tired of my ranting and raving on Facebook and I have grown to not care. I have to get my passions to center-stage.
My passion? Humanity. Although I am a (SUPER PROUD) black woman, I have an undying love for humanity that makes me preach love of all people.
I have to explain something. My mother raised me to respect people and to love people as they come. Although we don't see eye-to-eye on politics and religion, I have to thank my mama for teaching me acceptance.
Acceptance is something that I think a lot of black people are lacking these days. I constantly get "dragged" on the interwebs of social media for my topics but, I continue to preach love. Which brings us back to the status.
When I wrote the status, I was thinking of how the "woke" folk on Facebook were sharing photos of Ethiopia's last Emperor's grandson's wedding to a Black American woman. There was no harm in sharing the photos. The wedding was beautiful, they both looked wonderful and truly happy. Congratulations to them both. The harm came from the peanut gallery: those posting the photos with captions like, "How come they didn't get attention?" and "The royal wedding was just a distraction so we wouldn't be thinking about the royal Ethiopian wedding." and blah blah the rest.
So my question comes in here: Why is that the "super woke" feel like we can't be happy for more than one black person at a time?
Why are black people mad because some black people are happy for Meghan and Harry's happiness? Why can't we accept the happiness of more than one person at a time?
Instead of throwing around hateration throughout the entire internet, why can't we learn to spread love?
Let me dissect my status a little more: when I said "don't be so pro-black that you're anti-humanity", that didn't mean to start putting everyone before your own community. I think it's important to have love and reverence for your own community but, can you really love your community while hating other communities? Think about it.
We live in a world where, yes, black people are criminalized and drug through the treanches. And, it's okay to be angry about that. Hell, I'm personally pissed about it. But, do I hold any hate against anyone? No. I can't hold hate in my heart and do the work my community requires in order to be uplifted.
Guys, imagine if we dropped that "black against everybody 2k18" attitude and we made some allies! Imagine the magnificent things that can be done in this corrupt country if we were to join hands with other cultural groups?! Unity is what gets things accomplished.
Let's take Martin Luther King, Jr., for example (yes, I know it's cliche, but you'll get over it).
Because MLK was so adamant about unity, he was able to call upon millions around the world to stand with him until things started changing for the better. Of course black people were the majority of his supporters but, what would have happened had he not spread a love so great that the supreme court couldn't help but to rule segregated schools were unconstitutional? What would have happened had MLK not been so loving - EVEN TO THE SAME PEOPLE WHO JAILED HIM - that thousands would feel compelled to march on Washington with him? It wasn't just black people fighting to black civil rights.
Here's my theory in the most basic way of saying it: loving people does not make us weak - it makes us strong beyond compare.
Something that really brings my spirits down is seeing people walking around with hatred upon their hearts and spirts. Hate is such a burden to bear. Hate will tear you apart inside.
I mean... to wrap this up, let's cite some more cliches.
You catch more flies with honey than vinegar. (If you show some love, you can get more accomplished rather than showing disdain and hatred.
You can't fight fire with fire. (Sure, there are racists people who hate black people but, what will we get accomplished by hating racist people? Now we're just two hateful bumps on a log arguing on Facebook about who is better than who... and the world will still be moving along).
In short, I want to see my people smile. I want to see black children understanding how to be culturally responsive. I want to LGBTQ able to live their best love lives without question and fear of disownment. I want mass murders and wars with no point whatsoever to cease to exist. I want to see my people owning businesses, following their dreams, comfortably traveling the world. I want alladat.
But, we won't get alladat if we can't learn to choose love.
With infinite love,
ps. please notice that I never really mentioned being "nice". Sometimes, love isn't "nice". It can be a wake up call for a friend who is drinking themselves to death, a smack on the ass to tell a child to stop going toward the hot stove: love is just the desire to see other people doing well. And that is something that Aida Ade will always stand upon.